The Departure (A poem of grief)

(It will be okay…)

Here is a little sad note 
for the ones we've lost, 
the ones who meant the world to us, 
the ones who brought sunshine 
to our days, to our lives. 
Here is a little sad note 
for the beautiful souls we once knew, 
the ones we once called family, 
friend, love, universe. 
Here is a little sad note 
for the ones we loved, truly, 
the ones we still love, 
the ones we can never hear 
a word from, in this life, 
their lips sealed, as their fates.  

Dear, loved one, dear, loved one, 
our dearly departed, 
how we loved you! 
How we still love you! 
How that eats us, and eats us, 
within us. How we love you! 
We will always love you. 
And that you are gone, 
gone, so soon, 
and can never share this love 
with us, in this life 
eats us, and eats us, 
within us. How we love you! 
We will always love you. 

Here is a little sad note, 
for the ones who have lost 
someone who meant something 
irreplaceable, incomparable. 
Here is a little sad note, 
for the ones who would hold on 
to hope even at the end, 
that life would breathe another chance 
through a special someone's nostrils; 
the ones who would hope that the end 
did not really mean the end, 
even when it looked and felt like it, 
even when it was eventually 
a fact that it was (the end). 
Here is a little sad note 
for all our sad hearts, 
and sad thoughts, 
and deep sighs, 
and silent tears. 
Here is a little sad note 
for our streams of within, 
which never run dry, 
which never cease to flow, 
which never cease to drown us 
within us, within us. 
Here is a little sad note 
for our bitter tears, 
our bitter memories, 
and the ever-bitter "what ifs," 
and hopeless wishes 
(oh, our wishes!) 

The world seems a blur without them, 
does it not? 
Life can, sometimes, feel impossible 
without them, yes? 
Life can, most times, feel meaningless, 
without their smiles and their frowns, 
without the shared laughter, 
and the shared sadness, and sorrow. 

We know we must move on, don't we? 
That we must live our lives, 
be happy, learn to let go. 
We know all these, 
and some of us are even luckier 
to know much more than these. 
And yet, a memory pops up 
in our minds: 
the time they laughed their best, 
the time they smiled their broadest, 
the time they fought so hard and relentless, 
the time they were there for you, 
the time they gave you comfort, 
made you happy, and filled your heart 
with love, with love, oh, this love! 
A memory, surfaces, 
and your feelings surface, too. 
You laugh, and then you cry, 
and you cannot stop the tears, 
you cannot stand the pressure 
of what you have held down 
for as long as it felt like forever. 
Memories are beautiful, 
and they can haunt you 
in a beautiful way, 
even when it kills you, 
within you. 

Their time with us is over— 
death has them now, 
a new life has taken them. 
Their time with us was a blessing. 
That they left us without a goodbye 
hurts, saddens (and it sucks). 
You could look up at the stars, 
some nights, when you think of them. 
The stars are hope, 
and they are some mystery, 
like faith is, 
and they tell a story, the stars, 
a story so old and so far 
up in the sky. 
You could see your loved one 
among the stars 
if you looked long enough, 
some nights. 
You could listen to the rain, 
sometimes, when you miss them. 
You could watch the rain fall and fall. 
It is beautiful and peaceful, 
it is nostalgic and therapeutic. 
You could listen to the silence 
they left you with, 
and find comfort 
in the memory of their presence, 
and accept their absence. 
It is part of letting go, 
healing, and moving on. 

Should you find yourself sad, 
melancholic, 
I hope that deep down you will know: 
it will be okay. 

May you heal, and may you live, 
and live truly. 
Each our days will come, 
and such a sad tune 
will play in another's heart, 
and another will read 
a sad note as this one, 
with tears for you or for me.  
May we close our eyes 
with smiles 
and satisfaction. 

©benielangat, 2021.